The Top 100 Movies I Saw for the First Time in 2024
Stoney Keeley ranks the hundred movies he saw for the first time in 2024 in no holds barred fashion.
Another year is in the books. Over the course of the last 12 months, I have seen 100 movies for the first time. That mark is a personal best for me, and it was done completely accidentally. No idea why or how, but here we are. It’s time for our annual tradition - I’m going to take every movie I’ve seen for the first time this year and rank ‘em 100-1. LFG.
It was a film festival (IYKYK), But I still have to count it
100. Cubic Zirconia
Christmas drivel
99. Hot Frosty
98. The Merry Gentlemen
You only liked it because you were horny
97. Cruel Intentions
Hot messes and snoozefests
96. Borderlands
95. Catch A Killer
94. Dory Previn: On My Way to Where
93. Victor Frankenstein
92. The Legend of Bagger Vance
You only liked it because you were horny, Part 2
91. Wild Things
I don’t give a shit if it’s Shakespeare
90. Anyone But You
Did AI write this?
89. Red One
88. Christmas Even in Miller’s Point
87. Madame Web
86. Venom: The Last Dance
Casual forest noises to sleep to
85. In A Violent Nature
Disappointing
84. Drive-Away Dolls
Movies to watch while you’re fucked up
83. Boys Go to Jupiter
82. Clone Cops
Overrated
81. The Hunger Games, Mockingjay: Part 1
80. The Bling Ring
Okay, there were some fun nuggets in here
79. Tea
78. Scrooged
77. Godzilla vs. Kong: The New Empire
76. High Tension
The performances weren’t enough to make me care
75. Red Rocket
74. Joker Folie á Deux
73. Reptile
Did we really need this?
72. The Matrix Resurrections
I wanted to like it more
71. Dahomey
70. It Ends With Us
69. It Was All A Dream
Okay, now we’re having some fun
68. Griffin in Summer
67. Last Stop in Yuma County
66. Beat Down
65. The Idea of You
64. Bottoms
63. Terrifier
62. Hit Man
A Bit Overrated
61. A Clockwork Orange
Super easy watches
60. The Boys in the Boat
59. Thanksgiving
58. The Hunger Games, Mockingjay: Part 2
57. Deadpool & Wolverine
56. Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga
55. Abigail
54. The Equalizer 2
53. Finding Nemo
Genre-defining action
52. Commando
51. Kill Bill, Vol. 1
50. Snake Eyes
Very smooth
49. A Most Violent Year
48. Monkey Man
Scandalous and/or steamy
47. Conclave
46. Bonjour Tristesse
Harrowing
45. Porcelain War
Unhinged Nic Cage
44. The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent
43. Longlegs
Classic Hollywood Fun
42. The Fall Guy
41. The Substance
40. Baby Driver
39. Godzilla Minus One
38. Road House (2024)
37. The Equalizer
I don’t know about this guy…
36. A Different Man
35. Heretic
We don’t talk about Woody Allen any more
34. A Rainy Day in New York
Bunch of people yappin’
33. Gosford Park
32. Love Actually
They don’t make epics like this very often
31. Dune: Part Two
Can’t believe it took me this long to watch it
30. Die Hard
Bring the tissues
29. Thelma
28. A Real Pain
27. Memoir of a Snail
The creative spirit is alive and well
26. Hundreds of Beavers
25. Saturday Night
Well, this is kind of bleak…
24. Dark Waters
23. Killers of the Flower Moon
22. The Place Beyond the Pines
21. Swiss Army Man
“Cool” for a new generation
20. The Bikeriders
Needs more KFC
19. The Apprentice
Most likely to make elder millennials cry
18. My Old Ass
17. Didi
Most badass Jessica Chastain
16. Molly’s Game
Seems you either loved it or hated it
15. Poor Things
14. Love Lies Bleeding
13. Civil War
2024’s finest
12. Anora
11. Sing Sing
10. Challengers
Missed classics
9. Something’s Gotta Give
8. Lars and the Real Girl
7. Moneyball
Written like sharp poetry
6. American Fiction
My Top Five (the only 5/5s I gave out this year)
5. The Witch - Natural light, authentic architecture and clothing of the era, and the dialect are all examples of Eggers’ meticulous attention to detail as a filmmaker. It’s something I, for one, can’t help but respect. He’s a relentless researcher, and it shows in his craft. All are present in The Witch. I loved the conflict in this movie. Was it as simple as good vs. evil? Was it a cautionary tale of the dangers of isolation? Was it an example of how repression can alienate families? How desperation can impact the human mind? Was it secret desire boiling over? You can take it in a number of directions, and that’s what’s so fascinating about it to me. Not to mention, there’s a goat causing lots of problems in this movie. That’s sick.
4. The Sting - This just felt like what “going to the movies” is all about - some star power, a fun story with twists and turns, style, and tons of smoking, which we all know instantly makes everything look 10 times cooler. It was probably the most fun I had watching a movie all year.
3. Spotlight - Spotlight was a major player back during the 2015-16 awards run. Not only did it win Best Picture at the Oscars, but it also yielded acting noms for Mark Ruffalo and Rachel McAdams. For whatever reason, it slipped through the cracks for me. I have no idea what made me press play on it earlier this year, but as soon as I did, I was captivated. My attention was grabbed wholly and completely. I’m a sucker for a good journalism movie.
2. Lost In Translation - one of those films that had me just sitting in silence with my feelings after watching it. The potential profundity of the chance encounter and the question of what could’ve been permeate the air like tobacco smoke in a cigar lounge. Bill Murray was at his best, charming and charismatic, while showing a lonely sort of longing at moments when Scarlett Johansson’s Charlotte draws it out of him. What could we be if a single moment in our lives went a different way? That’s what this film had me contemplating, and that, folks, is my favorite type of film.
1. Nosferatu (2024) - full review - In Nosferatu, you’ll find a visceral exploration of desire, the horror of a supernatural evil, a beautifully dreary landscape, and even a slice of old Hollywood nostalgia. It’s all seen through the lens of one the movie industry’s most gifted and obsessive minds. 5/5, my favorite film of the year so far.